Divorce – The Bible’s Only Qualification and God’s Plan for Marriage

Good morning, Church! Today, we’re going to talk about a tough topic: Divorce. It’s a painful and often sensitive issue for many, and I want to approach it with grace, truth, and clarity. Whether you're divorced, contemplating divorce, or know someone who has gone through it, this message is for you.

We're going to explore what the Bible says about divorce, why God allows it in certain cases, and how we can honor Him in our relationships moving forward.

1. What Does the Bible Say About Divorce?

Let’s start by opening the Bible to Matthew 19:4-6, where Jesus speaks about marriage and divorce:

“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

Right from the start, God’s design for marriage is clear—one man, one woman, joined together as one. And it’s God’s desire that this union remains intact, because it reflects His covenant relationship with His people. But we also know that things aren’t always as they should be. There’s sin, brokenness, and pain in this world, and sometimes that affects our relationships.

In Matthew 19:8-9, Jesus acknowledges the reality of divorce:

“Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

Here’s the key qualification that Jesus gives for divorce: marital unfaithfulness. If a spouse is unfaithful, that is the biblical grounds for divorce. This is a serious matter in God's eyes, and He sees the betrayal that happens when one partner breaks the vows of marriage. However, even then, God’s heart is always towards reconciliation and healing.

2. Does This Apply to Only Christians or Non-Believers Too?

Now, some people wonder: “Does this only apply to Christians, or does it apply to everyone?” The short answer is: It applies to everyone.

Jesus’ words here were not just for believers, but for all people, because marriage itself is part of God’s design for humanity. Whether you're a Christian or not, God still views marriage as sacred and unbreakable unless there is marital unfaithfulness.

If you're a non-believer who has gone through a divorce, you may be thinking, “Does that mean I’m forever stuck? Can I never remarry?” Hold on, we're going to get there in a minute. But first, let's address something very important.

3. What if I Was Divorced Before I Was a Christian? Can I Remarry?

This is where it gets tricky. Maybe you went through a divorce before you were a Christian, for reasons other than marital unfaithfulness. You may have divorced for irreconcilable differences, for abuse, or just because things “weren’t working out.” And then, you found Christ, and now you're wondering, "What does that mean for me and my future?" Once you become a Christian, God sees you as a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17). Your past sins, including divorce, are forgiven, and you are given a fresh start.

4. Why Does God Say "No Remarriage"?

Some might be thinking, “Why would God say no remarriage after an unbiblical divorce? That seems so harsh!” But here's the thing—God’s desire is always for us to honor His Word, because His Word is meant for our good. He wants to protect us from the pain and consequences of sin, and the consequences of a broken marriage are deep and painful.

When someone divorces without biblical grounds and then remarries, it can lead to even more hurt, because God's design for marriage is being disregarded. And in His love, God is calling us to a higher standard—to respect the covenant of marriage and to seek reconciliation, healing, and restoration.

5. What If I’m in a Marriage Right Now and Want to Get Out?

If you're in a marriage right now and you're unhappy, struggling, or tempted to throw in the towel, let me say this clearly: Don’t make decisions based on emotions or circumstances alone.

If there’s unfaithfulness, that’s a legitimate reason to pursue divorce, but even in that, God’s heart is always toward healing. Seek counseling, prayer, and support from fellow believers. Divorce is not the first solution; reconciliation is always the goal.

And for those who have already gone through divorce and remarriage, remember this: God’s grace covers you. He does not want you to live in shame or regret. He wants you to learn, grow, and live out His purpose for you, regardless of past mistakes.

6. Conclusion: God's Heart for Marriage and Redemption

At the end of the day, God’s heart for marriage is that it reflects His relationship with His people—faithful, sacrificial, and enduring. Marriage is not a contract that can be broken easily, but a covenant that reflects the love between Christ and His Church.

If you’re struggling with the past, with divorce, or with the idea of remarriage, take heart: God’s grace is bigger than your mistakes. He is a God of redemption, and He will restore you. But it’s also important to remember that His Word remains true, and it’s for our good to honor the institution of marriage as He designed it.

So if you’re in a relationship now, honor God in it. If you’re considering remarriage, make sure your decisions align with God’s Word. And if you’re carrying the weight of a past divorce, remember this: You are forgiven, and you have the chance to live according to God’s perfect will from this day forward.

May God bless your relationships and help us all to honor Him in everything we do.

Amen.